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How to To Surrender

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Written by Nitika Chopra

Have you ever been in a situation like that? Where you are so ruled by another persons actions towards you that it becomes unhealthy?

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Have you ever been in a situation where you are so ruled by another persons actions towards you that it becomes unhealthy? Join Nitika Chopra as she shares “Why I Need to Surrender.


I have been going through something recently that has brought me an incredible amount of stress, sleepless nights, anxiety and more.  Every time I would get an email or phone call from a particular person I literally couldn’t sleep all night or I would be constantly looking at my phone to just make sure nothing had gone wrong since the last time this person emailed me.  Have you ever been in a situation like that?  Where you are so ruled by another persons actions towards you that it becomes unhealthy?  Well I have, and although I consider myself to be a pretty evolved and transformed being I have my moments of weakness, particularly when the person is very important to me.  So after months of dealing with this, I have decided to surrender.  OMG. YES!  I need to surrender.  Why do I need to surrender?  Because my heart needs to not feel constricted, my mind needs to not hurt from intense tension and if I don’t surrender I am certain I will be blocking every positive and blessed thing that tries to enter my life.

There is beauty in surrender. You want to feel clearer, freer and you surrender to let love in. Surrendering unblocks passages. It re-routes us on the path of love because it is through our releasing that places our faith back into love instead of fear. You are not giving up, or causing the situation to mean nothing, you are releasing control. You are literally weighing your options to see if something makes you feel heavy or light.

I believe that whatever we place our attention on, grows. Whether or not it’s something negative or positive. Placing all of your attention on whether or not that person is going to call produces more of that heavy feeling. More anxiety. Try placing your attention on the need to feel calm and free, this will lead you towards a deep surrender.

So, for a moment, stop where you are. Take a deep breath. How do you feel? Paying attention to every feeling brought about in the current situation, can you see what specifically seems to be weighing you down? Did a feeling automatically come up just by bringing attention to yourself? Sit with those feelings and decide whether they make you feel heavier or lighter.

Now, I want you to explore a little bit further. It’s important to get in touch with your true self, to honor yourself, your thoughts and your feelings. Uncover those heavier feelings or thoughts and ask yourself why you need to surrender them. Is it to be more at ease? is it to feel healthier? You are in the drivers seat, what is it you wish to take let go of?  By asking yourself these questions I am certain you will also be uncovering side effects that you weren’t even aware of from your situation!

This is your declaration. You are fully surrendering to the current situation, releasing control and allowing it to be. You’ve reached the peak of uncertainty and although it may feel scary, you feel lighter. What a load off, right? Blessing, prayers or any good words can be sent off with your surrender. And with surrendering comes much peace of mind, better health and more colorful days.

Your life is what you make it. It is your collection of thoughts, words and actions. Let today be the day to breathe in life.

We hear people mention surrendering all the time and how important it is, but I invite you to get grounded in WHY you need to surrender. I believe once you do that, the actual act of surrendering will happen effortlessly.  So what do you have going on in your life right now that has a hold on you in a way you wish it didn’t?  Get honest with yourself about what your life would look like if you were free from that issue and allow yourself to SURRENDER IT!


Identity Magazine is all about empowering women to get all A’s in the game of life – Accept. Appreciate. Achieve.™ Every contributor and expert answer the Identity 5 questions in keeping with our theme. As a team, we hope to inspire and motivate ourselves and inspire you to get all A’s.

What have you accepted in your life that took time, physically or mentally?

I have accepted that I have a curvy body!  I am not a toothpick and I never will be, all I need to do is take care of my body and it will continue to take care of me.

What do you appreciate about yourself and within your life?

I appreciate that I take the time to get to the root of what is really going on in every situation. I don’t just assume or jump to conclusions, I take my time and do the work to authentically figure out the truth in situations.

What is one of your most rewarding achievements in life? What goals do you still have?

One of my most rewarding achievements is starting Bella Life and turning this experience in to getting my own talk show.  I still have goals to grow my site to an even bigger one and to fully monetize the site.

What is your not-so-perfect way? What imperfections and quirks create your Identity?

My not-so-perfect way is that I am really sensitive.  I always say it is a blessing and some times a “curse”.  Because I am sensitive it makes me much more compassionate and kinder to others, but it also has me take things so much more personally which can get tricky!

How would you complete the phrase “I Love My…?”

I love my FRIENDS.  I feel so incredibly blessed to have close friends that I can lean on for any and everything.

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About the author

Nitika Chopra

Nitika Chopra is the passionate, colorful and inspirational voice behind www.YourBellaLife.com, the online lifestyle magazine she founded in 2009. Nitika believes that love and happiness are possible in every moment, and she has dedicated her life to helping others embrace this mindset. With “Your Bella Life,” Nitika’s dream of empowering women to find affirmation in every moment is coming true.

Nitika is a certified life coach, a go-to resource for young women around the globe, and a motivational lifestyle guru to her thousands of monthly readers and fans. Each week, Your Bella Life offers original content in a variety of categories, from fashion to finance, written by over 30 experts in each field. Nitika encourages her readers to actively participate in the online conversation and to overcome life’s challenges to lead a vibrant life bursting with color.

Growing up, Nitika battled debilitating health problems that made it difficult to walk with ease for many years. This challenge, among others, fueled her passion for helping individuals and has made her an empathetic resource. “I can relate to most of the issues young women are going through today — sometimes just sharing my experiences with them can make their journey transform from hopeless to hopeful.”

Harnessing the power of communities and social networks, Nitika created Colorful Conversations, a series of networking events and social gatherings for women. She has also created strategic partnerships with companies and brands she supports, including Juice Beauty, Glow Gluten Free, VMV Cosmetics and Soho Sanctuary.

In 2011 Nitika was invited to speak at the prestigious REVEAL conference hosted by Donna Karan’s Urban Zen Foundation on healing one’s authentic soul wound. She regularly interviews inspiring influencers on Burst TV, an online video channel that she produces and hosts, such as Roc Nation artist Bridget Kelly.

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