Gandhi said, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” I see people spouting out this motto every day with no real application on the ground. When you see yourself struggling against people’s hypocrisy or merely struggling to help someone turn their life around, it’s important to know that you can’t force people to change. People change whenever they want to, with or without instances enforced by life to stimulate that change.
The easiest thing to do is to start with yourself. If you want to see peace, advocate it. If you wish to feel compassion, show it. If you desire to live love, shower others with it. Whatever you dream to witness around you, express it. Start small and step by step you will begin to see change around you.
It’s not easy, I get it, but it’s the easiest doable thing to change the world. It’s constant work to be faced by people’s agonizing contradictions everyday and even harder work to not let those contradictions affect you. It’s tricky when people hurt you and all you want to do is transform those feelings of hurt and/or anger into positive energy. You basically have to learn how to recycle your feelings and thoughts. You take something that would otherwise be harmful, mostly to yourself, and turn it into something that would benefit you before anyone else. If you can imagine how hard this can be for yourself, imagine how difficult it would be to help others do the same.
Most importantly, don’t be naive. Be smart about it, get to know yourself inside out, know when it would be good for you to deal with your thoughts and emotions first hand, and when it would be better to let things sink in completely! This is why you can’t force someone to change, because you are the person who knows yourself better and it applies to everyone else.
So, how can you help yourself be the change you want to see in the world?
1-Spend all the time you can studying yourself, know yourself inside out.
2-Ask yourself why you’re seeking change in the first place.
3-Ask yourself what can you do to improve yourself? Is there a trait you’d like to improve to get rid of?
4-With change comes learning, so do you believe there’s something you need to learn you reach your goal?
5-Working on one trait can take time and be exhausting, so it’s important you keep reminding yourself of the reason you’re doing this.
6-Go by the motto “Small but sustainable!” So start with small steps, small adjustments you can make in your life so you’ll be able to keep them up. It’s the small things that make the difference.
7-It’s normal to feel discouraged and tempted to quit, especially if you face resistance from those around you. Try to find someone to take those small steps along with you. The more people helping you, the more you’ll be able to sustain those steps you’re taking.
8-With the help of those around you, you’ll subconsciously move onto making bigger changes.
9-As you progress, your companions will naturally be affected by every new step so they will develop with you.
Some of these steps might be repeated several times, you have to be persistent. And you will need to assess yourself every now and then, but always remember that “You can’t be at your best, if you can always be better.”
What have you accepted within your life, physically and/or mentally? What are you still working on accepting?
I used to be braver back in college, stood up for myself and took pride in it. Having this kind of self-confidence at work was very tough, but I’ve learned that nothing can replace it. Standing up for myself at work is a challenge I still face every day but it’s worth it.
What have you learn to appreciate about yourself and/or within your life, physically and mentally? What are you still working on to appreciate?
It’s okay to stop people from prying into my business. My life is different from even those closest to me, no matter how similar our circumstances can be, they are never the same.
What is one of your most rewarding achievements in life? What makes YOU most proud? What goals and dreams do you still have?
Retraining myself to be a good listener. I have very talkative colleagues at work and I used to not engage in any of their conversations but by the time I got home, my listening tank was full. Gradually, I tried to shut their talks out and by engaging in some of their conversations I was able to increase the size of that tank. I’m still working on it.
We all have imperfections, so we think. The truth—we are all perfectly imperfect. What are your not-so-perfect ways? What imperfections and quirks create who you are—your Identity?
In “You’ve Got Mail” Jo told Cathrine that she should stand up for herself and if she was faced with someone she hated, she should just speak her mind without thinking, the one drop was the surge of guilt she’d feel if she did as he said. I’ve acquired that trait minus the rude comments and the guilt, so I can smartly stop others from undermining me.
“I Love My…” is an outlet for you to express and appreciate all the positive traits that make you…well… YOU! Sharing what you love about yourself will make you smile, feel empowered, and uplift your spirit and soul. (we assure you!)
I love those fleeting moments of evil I feel every time I have to shut out someone sticking their nose in my business. These days I’ve been facing a lot of situations when people I barely know try to impose themselves on me or dig their way into my private life. I never faced these instances so much at work until my engagement. I know I have a right to protect this part of my life and as long as I don’t offend anyone, then I can retort respectfully. So, when I do retort I get this feeling that I’m being evil, not in the actual sense of the word but the same triumphant feeling Harry Potter got when he had one over Draco Malfoy.
Identity challenges you to complete the phrase “I Love My…?
I Love My ability to be able to get to others in different ways. Everyone receives and understands things differently, being able to get to people no matter how different they are is a blessing I love and am thankful for.